Posts by Mommie Dark

22

Silly post: funny UK placenames

by expatbrit in

i'm feeling silly, so here's some of my favourite silly uk place names, courtesy of http://www.jump-around.com/tools/place-names/.

assloss.

balls cross.

What are your favorite quotes about JW's?

by Mindchild in

jw
friends

do you have any favorite quotes of either something the watchtower said or quotes from outsiders about the witnesses?.

here are two of my own.... "when i was a kid in the ghetto, a gang started going around harassing people, so some of the toughest kids formed a gang called the sharks to stop them.

the other gang was called the jehovah's witnesses.

True story: my girlfriend told me this last night. Two men in nice suits came to her door, and she thought 'Oh Gawd JWs NOT NOW' and apparently she looked really peeved because one of the guys put his hands up and said, "Wait a minute, we're NOT Jehovah's Witnesses... we're here from Domino's Pizza," and proceeded to offer her a charity coupon deal they were offering for the holiday.

She laughed her ass off, and bought the coupon book. They said corporate made them dress real nice to do the charity thing but that they had got the same reaction pretty much wherever they went.

Once the misunderstanding was cleared up, folks were much friendlier.

Think JWs should start offering pizza coupons with the litterachure?

56

"Such an evil star"

by Yadirf in

jw
friends

december 29, 1999. writing department.

25 columbia heights.

brooklyn, ny 11201-2483. .

Mommie Dark

Friday talking about logic and reason is like a hooker pontificating on sexual abstinence.

2

Christmas preview

by Mommie Dark in

jw
friends

i complain regularly about the little rural community wherein i reside.

it's a very very affluent community with a pockmarked seamed underbelly of stark poverty.

viewed with the right jaundice-colored glasses, there is a lot wrong with the sociopolitical scene here in corntown.

Mommie Dark

I complain regularly about the little rural community wherein I reside. It's a very very affluent community with a pockmarked seamed underbelly of stark poverty. Viewed with the right jaundice-colored glasses, there is a lot wrong with the sociopolitical scene here in Corntown.

Of course as JWs we all wore those bile-colored glasses when viewing the world and the things in it. And I find it's hard to teach the old dog a new way of looking at the world. But this Christmas season is having a nice bash at the bad lenses, slipping some rosier tones into the replacement lenses.

My oldest son and his fiancee took me with them to the official tree-lighting ceremony on the town square. They brought a wheelchair and set me up like a queen in a little mobile throne.

Our affluent community decorates grandly, with tasteful white lights on everything, it is quite a spectacle.

Downtown was closed to traffic and all the local businesses were brightly-lit and decorated; many of the windows were shrouded until the official lighting, at which time delighful animated surprises were unveiled. The shop windows were all gorgeous, the doors open wide, browsing and shopping all done with smiles and cheery greetings all around. One business had ice sculptors on the street outside, busy carving angels and other icons of the season. A brass band played carols, and huge draft horses patiently pulled wagonloads of happy people around the square to see the sights. People strolled in happy elbow-to-elbow throngs, greeting each other and smiling at dogs, kids, babies.

I learned that all people on wheels make eye contact with one another; little kids in strollers grinned at me as we wheeled past, as did the other wheeled adults (I also learned that my eldest child takes pleasure in pushing me around in the wheelchair, and he's getting so he thinks the top of my head is his special kissing place. It's an odd feeling, the first step on the road that leads to the natural role reversal of caretaking. I find it hard to gracefully accept the ministrations of his new little family. I'm the caregiver dangit, whatchoo doin tryin to put a lap robe on ME? ).

There were roving clowns and other characters (a pink hippo, a walking Christmas tree, elves, a giant teddy bear) giving away balloons, candy canes, little favors to the kids. Folks passed out candles to hold aloft around the tree; teens spread out to offer their candles to others, and the lighting of them became part of the sharing. My new grandkids seemed to enjoy sticking close and showing Grandma the best bits, after a candle-lighting foray through the crowd.

Santa appeared on the roof of a corner building and our valiant fire squad rescued him with a ladder truck. Then the tree was lit with proper ceremony.

Afterwards folks sipped hot chocolate courtesy of one of the local clubs, strolled the strip again, and shopped/gawked/chatted/laughed, a beautiful clatter of happy noise.

I looked around at the crowd: my neighbors, associates, acquaintances, strangers: all ages, races, backgrounds, all together to share the joy of the holiday. I considered the JW attitude, that Christmas is just a filthy Babylonish paganism, that all those people are misguided at best, willfully sinful at worst, and deserving of destruction. I considered the beaming faces, the cheerful examples of kindness and decency unfolding before my eyes, and wondered anew at the narrow hardhearted philosophy of JWdom, where something so warm and wonderful could be spurned out of some dessicated scrupulosity for doctrinal purity.

The jaundiced bits of Mommie reminded her that the local merchants intend to recoup the cost of the entertainment in Christmas sales. Reminded her that some of the raggedy-looking folks standing around the square would not have much more holiday fun that what they could glean by standing and looking at the toys of the very rich.

I told the jaundiced bits to shut the smeg up and let me enjoy the flow of the moment. Wonder of wonders, they shut the smeg up and let me enjoy! Was this the Dark Christmas miracle?

I had a wonderful filthy debauched apostate time during the entire affair. It was a lovely evening, and when the kids asked me if I want to come with them to the tree-lighting at the big cemetery next week, I agreed happily.

If this is evil, then give me more of it! A whole community being nice and happy together: oh, the world and the things in it! Yummy!

15

Christmas

by ARoarer in

jw
friends

hey everyone, i am thinking of having a tree this year for the very first time since i stopped going to the kh.

although i am not disfellowshipped and i have not written a letter to disassociate, the closest friends i have had over the years as a witness have all chosen to avoid me and my family unless we return to the hall.

unofficial shunning by those who we have loved.

Mommie Dark

LOL Julie can't smegging hardasses have holiday cheer too? Now what would a smegging hardass DO to celebrate?

Well, first we have the annual Attack of the Killer Santas, where I set up my tiny Xmas village and arrange much bigger Santas from around the world in a flanking maneuver around it... this is a family tradition now and one we all look forward to with glee.

Then there is the giant fuzzy spider that is a permanent fixture hanging in the living room; he gets a web o' lights each Xmas season, a tiny santa cap and a stocking with little trinket bugs in it.

Then there is the Dr. Demento Christmas recordings, the heinously funny South Park Christmas songs, the vintage 'smutty' Christmas tunes my precious hubby collects...

Enlightened? Oh HELL no...but I do occasionally wear my special infrared specs for spiritual darkness. Happy? Grinning like an idiot all through the season!

Love
MD
'smegging hardass class'

15

Christmas

by ARoarer in

jw
friends

hey everyone, i am thinking of having a tree this year for the very first time since i stopped going to the kh.

although i am not disfellowshipped and i have not written a letter to disassociate, the closest friends i have had over the years as a witness have all chosen to avoid me and my family unless we return to the hall.

unofficial shunning by those who we have loved.

Mommie Dark

Roarer, I wish you all the joy of the season in whatever way you choose to express it.

During the transition out of the JW mindset, it's important that we not feel pressured to take up any customs that give us further emotional turmoil.

It helped me a lot to think of the season in non-religious terms; I concentrated on the family aspect of holiday times. The pre-Christian reasons for celebrating during the darkest time of the year made sense to me; first we honor the dead at harvest time, then we give thanks for another year's bounty, and then in the cold dark heart of the winter when the nights are longest, we make a joyful noise and bring light to the heart of that darkness with human voices and human kindness.

Since God is no longer a working member of our household, we make the most of the milk of human kindness, blend it into some tasty eggnog, and pass it around to all who pass our way. This works for us; what works for you will of course be unique to you.

If Christianity is still your paradigm, then concentrate on that aspect of the season. It's important that whatever celebrating you do be from the heart, unhindered by useless guilts and social expectations. Holidays are supposed to be joy-filled; if they're not, you're probably pushing too hard.

Most important... RELAX! Have fun with your family. Make memories. That's what holidays are supposed to be about. Do whatever feels right for YOU and forget about what JWs may think of it. If a gorgeous shiny tree makes your heart sing, go for it! Rejoice in it!

Just remember, the meaning of the season resides in your heart and the hearts of those you love and those to whom you reach out. Please don't let anyone dictate to you what methods you should use to express that meaning.

7

The Big Show This Weekend...

by mikepence in

jw
friends

...is not harry potter, it is the leonid meteor showers!.

see http://www.leonidstorm.com/.

this is a once in a lifetime viewing opportunity.

Mommie Dark

and as usual when sky phenom promise to be spectacular, Corntown is scheduled to be blanketed in big old gray clouds!

Wishing just ONCE the weather would co-operate,
MD
skywatcher, thwarted class

53

Who Wants A Christmas Card?

by Englishman in

jw
friends

i want to send lots of christmas greetings cards this year.

i especially want to send a card to dozens of posters from this site.

i suppose the obvious answer is that folks email me with an address.

Mommie Dark

Mommie LOVes Christmad cards but unfortunately there is no room in this year's budget for it.

Is it impolite to sign up to get cards when I know I won't be sending any?

15

Old Kingdom Melodies

by muslima in

jw
friends

even after a bit of time has gone by - do lyrics to "kingdom melodies" still drift in anyone's head?.

it is over 6 years now -- yesterday and even still now - for whatever reason the song with the lyrics "the way of the truth is the best way of living" -- just that line kept going through my head!

it's driving me crazy!.

Mommie Dark

OK I know I've told this story before but it still cracks me up:

I knew a JW family that had a talking parrot. When they had the book study at their house the mom would take the cage into a back bedroom and cover it. One night after book study the kids were showing me the bird and they told me it sang "We're Jehovah's Witnesses". So I asked if they could get it to sing.

Mom said 'no, he's lost his zeal for Jehovah'. Finally, when pressed, she admitted that the bird had dropped a few syllables, and now would only sing 'We're Jehovah's Witnesses, we speak out in fear.'

Didn't know peanutbrained birds could be so smart did you?

17

Do you still believe in god???

by Nicolas in

jw
friends

how many of you still believe in god after your experience of the watchtower?

do you believe in a different god than the one of the org.

one who won't destroy somebody just because he wasn't in the good religion.

Mommie Dark

The Devil to God, from "Faust" by Randy Newman:

"all of the faith and prayer in the world,
all of your dumb show and circuses,
You know it's a lie,
it'll always be a lie,
the invention of an animal
who knows he's going to die.
Some fools in the desert
with nothing else to do
so scared of the dark they didn't know
if they were coming or going---
so they invented me,
and they invented You
and other fools keep it all going
and growing..."

I belive God exists in the hearts and minds of those too frightened of life's randomness to face it without a buffer.